I can't believe

The one night I don't watch in the entire series and the celebs on aforementioned love island go getting all steamy. Actually I'm glad I missed it as it involved Paul Danan (of, call me a movie star i.e. I have been a bit part in Hollyoaks, fame) who I currently want to stab for hurting the lady.

Far be it from me to rush to the aid of the aristocracy under normal circumstances, but this particular Lady (Isabella Hervey) is so vulnerable, so lovely, so honest and so much like my mate Ailsa that it's only the fact I am on a too strict to be believed budget that keeps me from texting her name repeatedly every time she's at risk of eviction.

So Paul, to those not following, spends three weeks trying to snog her, employing a range of seriously dubious tactics from getting drunk and begging to calling her cold, followed by getting drunk and begging before trying for a fight to showcase his masculinity, to calling her cold and begging again. Amazingly, after a few days of behaving like a semi-human being, she decided maybe his consistency was worth a look in and started getting all warm and 'you can come in'. At which point they ship some plastic playboy centrefold who spends her life in front of the mirror in and hey presto, Paul's off claiming it was never love and it's the lady's fault for 'messing me around'.

The knife is out. Please can everyone email everyone else they know with a 'let's get Paul off the island' campaign to stop the lads who'll go 'I can't believe he got the playboy model in the bog, go man'. Which will undoubtedly translate to ill deserved votes.

Whilst the playgirl in the toilet episode unfolded I was at the launch of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival followed by a tad of dancing at a girls night. This I braved all by myself and thoroughly enjoyed. I was mid detox and barely transgressed at all ( one glass of wine). I got a dose of my joint favorite exercise (dancing) and made new friends. I got home sober, at a reasonable hour (2am) and alone, despite a number of offers for company. Having resisted the usual usual chips en route, I realised this is it. This is grown up life. And liked it.