The last straw

I have no idea what I am going to write about from here on in.
I do know it won't be dates.
before you all go 'oh there she goes again, with that I can be private about my love life nonsense, before spilling the beans for our amusement', I'll say it's not that.
It's not that I'm going to have loads of amazing dates and keep them all as a sexy lovely secret to myself. How horrid would that be? Too horrid.
Nope, I'm not having any.
Before those of you who know me best go ' uh huh, a Julie celibacy, off dating spell, that'll last a week', I'll say, it will. And longer.
'What?' I hear you cry, 'could have brought this on?'.
A singles night brought this on.
Nettie sends an email. 'single gorgeous gals, we're taking life in our own hands, sod the speed dating, sod the nasty cattle market events, sod dating agencies and personal ads and hoping the guy who smiled at you on the tube is not wearing a ring cos he's unattached rather than just messing round on his pregnant wife indoors.... Or allergic to gold'.... It didn't say this exactly, I'm improvising, it did say
'come to (some trendy hard surfaced bar) in Liverpool street, bring a man you don't fancy.'
Nettie brought two. I tried to invite the millionaire, but he was househunting in Sark. She covered me with a spare ex boyfriend she found hanging around in her garage.
Dad rang on the day of the big event
'want to go out?'
'sorry Dad, can't, out with Nettie'
'Just the three of us then' asked Dad hopefully (he has a soft spot for Nettie')
'Nope, we're going to a singles night'
'singles night? Can I come, I'm single?'
'nope'.
Net says
'ah let him come, your dad's a laugh'
then, worryingly
'don't let me snog him'.
I tell her
'honey I've told him he's not your type, if you decide to revise that, fine, if you want to kiss my dad, ewww, but fine, just don't ask me to referee it.'
The whole thing is feeling like a really bad idea at this point
I ring dad. 'you're coming'.
It's tragic. Dad and Net behave.
A table full of the most gorgeous, gregarious, witty women you've ever met. Two of Nets exes (off limits), my dad, and a man who looks like he has downs syndrome and tries to impress with 'I have no idea how much I earn anymore, lots, but lost count....'
Enough to put any woman off dating. Even me.
So looks like I need to find other things to write about.